Comments on: IBARW http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/ ... the online home of a librarian in Perth, Western Australia Wed, 07 Jan 2009 16:39:56 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.2.2 By: CW http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1356 CW Mon, 24 Jul 2006 22:19:39 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1356 M, in answer to q.1, no, there were other 'girls' at the stop and he asked them happily enough.<br/>q.2, me, <i>scary</i>? I suppose it was possible, but he wasn't giving off <i>this woman's scary ergo I can't talk to her</i> vibes...<br/>q.3, I don't think so. That's like saying being hit wouldn't be so bad if you weren't so sensitive to it. The problem with these sorts of interactions is that they tend to happen when you aren't expecting them, and nothing softens the blow, so to speak. I do agree that one <i>could</i> walk around with a giant chip on one's shoulder, and practically <i>invite</i> confrontation, but most people I know don't do this... M, in answer to q.1, no, there were other ‘girls’ at the stop and he asked them happily enough.
q.2, me, scary? I suppose it was possible, but he wasn’t giving off this woman’s scary ergo I can’t talk to her vibes…
q.3, I don’t think so. That’s like saying being hit wouldn’t be so bad if you weren’t so sensitive to it. The problem with these sorts of interactions is that they tend to happen when you aren’t expecting them, and nothing softens the blow, so to speak. I do agree that one could walk around with a giant chip on one’s shoulder, and practically invite confrontation, but most people I know don’t do this…

]]> By: m http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1355 m Mon, 24 Jul 2006 02:27:50 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1355 Gonna play devils advocate here.<br/><br/>Could he have not asked cos you were a girl and he wasn't mature enough to interact with 'girls'?<br/><br/>Could he have not asked cos you looked scary and not someone he would normally approach? You did have your hair shaved and looked very non-conventional when I first met you?<br/><br/>Could he have reacted to your slightly reserved, possibly starting to be hostile demeanor rising out of your anticipating a 'racist' interaction?<br/><br/>I also often wonder how much racist behaviour is amplified due to the object of the reacism already feeling like they are an outsider and being sensitive to any possible negative action. From what I gather and see you rarely receive any racist ramarks or actions anymore. How much of this is due to your feeling of 'place' and your self confidence with it.<br/><br/>That said, I have never been a racial minority in my place of residence so I probably don't truly understand it. Gonna play devils advocate here.

Could he have not asked cos you were a girl and he wasn’t mature enough to interact with ‘girls’?

Could he have not asked cos you looked scary and not someone he would normally approach? You did have your hair shaved and looked very non-conventional when I first met you?

Could he have reacted to your slightly reserved, possibly starting to be hostile demeanor rising out of your anticipating a ‘racist’ interaction?

I also often wonder how much racist behaviour is amplified due to the object of the reacism already feeling like they are an outsider and being sensitive to any possible negative action. From what I gather and see you rarely receive any racist ramarks or actions anymore. How much of this is due to your feeling of ‘place’ and your self confidence with it.

That said, I have never been a racial minority in my place of residence so I probably don’t truly understand it.

]]> By: CW http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1354 CW Sun, 23 Jul 2006 10:31:03 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1354 jl, yes, pathetic. <br/><br/>Mooiness, thankfully nowadays these sorts of occurences are very rare..<br/><br/>Toxicpurity, I agree they <i>are</i> out there. It's always a jolt when you come across them...<br/><br/>Ivan I don't stay angry for long (in fact I'm not even sure 'anger' is what I'd call it. More incredulity at how some people can be so narrowminded and ignorant.) Mostly I rouse myself enough to respond, just so they don't think they can get away with being rude or downright nasty...<br/><br/>Dee, I might have dismissed it as just being that, except for the fact that he asked <i>everybody</i> else - and declined to say anything to me, even though he saw my watch... :) jl, yes, pathetic.

Mooiness, thankfully nowadays these sorts of occurences are very rare..

Toxicpurity, I agree they are out there. It’s always a jolt when you come across them…

Ivan I don’t stay angry for long (in fact I’m not even sure ‘anger’ is what I’d call it. More incredulity at how some people can be so narrowminded and ignorant.) Mostly I rouse myself enough to respond, just so they don’t think they can get away with being rude or downright nasty…

Dee, I might have dismissed it as just being that, except for the fact that he asked everybody else - and declined to say anything to me, even though he saw my watch… :)

]]> By: Deanne http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1353 Deanne Sun, 23 Jul 2006 05:10:00 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1353 Hi CW,<br/><br/>I wonder if this guy has ideas about who it's reasonable to ask a favour of? Like you might only ask family to pick you up when your car breaks down, or you might only ask a few mates to help you shift house, this guy might only feel comfortable asking people he thinks are the 'same' as him - people he feels he 'knows' without knowing - for the time? Lol, sounds ridiculous now I've written it down. <br/><br/>I know what it's like to have people ask small favours and then apologise when they realise/remember I can't see well and ask someone else - even though it's no trouble for me to help. Very frustrating - it's like they have ideas about what's reasonable that don't match reality. A strange kind of discrimination but discrimination nonetheless. Hi CW,

I wonder if this guy has ideas about who it’s reasonable to ask a favour of? Like you might only ask family to pick you up when your car breaks down, or you might only ask a few mates to help you shift house, this guy might only feel comfortable asking people he thinks are the ’same’ as him - people he feels he ‘knows’ without knowing - for the time? Lol, sounds ridiculous now I’ve written it down.

I know what it’s like to have people ask small favours and then apologise when they realise/remember I can’t see well and ask someone else - even though it’s no trouble for me to help. Very frustrating - it’s like they have ideas about what’s reasonable that don’t match reality. A strange kind of discrimination but discrimination nonetheless.

]]> By: Ivan Chew http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1352 Ivan Chew Sat, 22 Jul 2006 07:33:15 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1352 I wonder what I'll do if I ever encounter racism. Will I get angry? If I do, I must remind to tell myself, "Anger is a form of punishment that we inflict upon ourselves for someone's stupidity". I wonder what I’ll do if I ever encounter racism. Will I get angry? If I do, I must remind to tell myself, “Anger is a form of punishment that we inflict upon ourselves for someone’s stupidity”.

]]> By: ToxicPurity http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1351 ToxicPurity Fri, 21 Jul 2006 12:29:45 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1351 Skribe and I were on a train last year when some guy began mouthing off at a group of Chinese students next to him for not talking in English. Skribe told him he was being offensive. An exchange of views ensued. When the guy realised skribe wouldn't be bullied and nobody else on the train shared his view about the English language, he stomped off at the next stop.<br/><br/>They're rare, but they're there. Skribe and I were on a train last year when some guy began mouthing off at a group of Chinese students next to him for not talking in English. Skribe told him he was being offensive. An exchange of views ensued. When the guy realised skribe wouldn’t be bullied and nobody else on the train shared his view about the English language, he stomped off at the next stop.

They’re rare, but they’re there.

]]> By: mooiness http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1350 mooiness Fri, 21 Jul 2006 03:36:26 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1350 Oh wow, that story resonates with me. I have similar experiences whilst waiting to be served when I'd be overlooked. *grrr*<br/><br/>Though most times, the white person that the counter person incorrectly tries to serve first would point out that I was there before them. Then all is well with the world again. Oh wow, that story resonates with me. I have similar experiences whilst waiting to be served when I’d be overlooked. *grrr*

Though most times, the white person that the counter person incorrectly tries to serve first would point out that I was there before them. Then all is well with the world again.

]]> By: jl http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1349 jl Fri, 21 Jul 2006 00:38:06 +0000 http://blog.flexnib.com/2006/07/20/ibarw/#comment-1349 Some people are so astoundingly pathetic.<br/><br/>You pose a good question there. He probably would've chosen to drown. Being saved by a non-Caucasian person would've been akin to death anyway, no? Some people are so astoundingly pathetic.

You pose a good question there. He probably would’ve chosen to drown. Being saved by a non-Caucasian person would’ve been akin to death anyway, no?

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